What
Really Sucks Contributed by Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.
Do you
know the real problem with the upcoming Presidential elections?

One
of these idiots is gonna win!
Kid's
Advice on Marriage Contributed by Charlie of New Jersey
1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
- You got to find
somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should
like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip
coming.
--- Alan, age 10

- No person really
decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides
it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
--- Kristen, age 10
2. WHAT IS THE
RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
- Twenty-three is
the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
--- Camille, age 10
3. HOW CAN A STRANGER
TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
- You might have
to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
--- Derrick, age 8

4. WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
- Both don't want
any more kids.
---
Lori, age 8
5. WHAT DO MOST
PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

- Dates are for having
fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys
have something to say if you listen long enough.
--- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)
- On the first date,
they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested
enough to go for a second date.
--- Martin, age 10
6. WHEN IS IT OKAY
TO KISS SOMEONE?
- When they're rich.
--- Pam, age 7
- The law says you
have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
--- Curt, age 7
- The rule goes like
this:
If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them.
It's the right thing to do.
--- Howard, age 8
7. IS IT BETTER
TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
- It's better for
girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after
them.
--- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)
8. HOW WOULD THE
WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

- There sure would
be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
--- Kelvin, age 8
And
the #1 Favorite is...
9. HOW WOULD YOU
MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
- Tell your wife
that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.
--- Ricky, age 8

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Videos of the week:
Dan
Akroyd Audition Contributor:
Peter
Paul of South Pasadena, CA
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Some women actually find Dan attractive. I guess
humor is pretty up there in the attractive quotient. Here's
Dan Akroyd's audtion for Saturday Night Live. He oozed with talent
from the start. I looked for his Julia Child skit but (believe it
or not) it's not in Youtube. Must be some legal mumbo jumbo going
on there. Enjoy!
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Evidence
That Humans Cause Tsunamis Contributor:
Bryan
of Fort Lauderdale, Florida
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Did you know that Tsunamis are man-made?
I
didn't think it was possible until I saw this shocking video.
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Bette
Midler in Yankee Stadium Contributor:
Charlie
of New Jersey
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Last Sunday we remembered 15th years past that awful
day when the world woke up to the reality that there are strangers
who want to kill us --- believing that this will solve their perceived
problems of inequality. Bette Midler's rendition of "The Wind
Beneath My Wings" was a fitting THANK YOU to our fallen friends.
TGIF people! Be good this weekend. There's a reason why you're still
living and breathing in this world.
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