Political
Reconciliation Contributed by Shag of New York
The
last thing I want to do is hurt you ...
 ... but it's still on my list.
A
Dark and Stormy Night Contributed by Rodney of Manitoba, B.C.
This
is a looooong Halloween Joke originally sent by Dulce of Vancouver, B.C.
way back in 2009
Bob
Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing
in Europe... as it happened, near Transylvania. They were driving
in a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late and raining
very hard. Bob could barely see the road in front of the car. Suddenly
the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to
no avail! The car swerves and smashes into a tree.
Moments later, Bob
shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger
seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the
rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to get her medical assistance.
Bob
carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a
short while, he sees a light. He heads towards the light, which is coming
from a large, old house. He approaches the door and knocks.
A
minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts,
"Hello, my name is Bob Hill , and this is my wife Betty . We've been
in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please
use your phone?"
"I'm
sorry," replied
the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor;
come in and I will get him!" Bob brings his wife in.
An older man comes
down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you.
I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist ... However, it is many miles
to the nearest clinic, and I have had a basic medical training. I will
see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory"
With that, Igor picks
up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely.
Igor places Betty
on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries,
so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.
After a brief examination,
Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare
a transfusion ..." Igor and his master work feverishly, but to
no avail. Bob and Betty Hill are no more.
The Hills' deaths
upset Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory,
which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found
solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills
the house.

 |
Meanwhile,
Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and
he notices the fingers on Betty's hand twitch, keeping time
to the haunting piano music.. |
 |
Stunned,
he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise, marking the beat! He is
further amazed as Betty and Bob both sit up straight!
Unable
to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory.
He
bursts in and shouts to his master:
"Master,
Master! .....
The Hills are alive
with the Sound of Music!"

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