Natural Laws

WALKING DAY

I'm physically drained. Thursday I traveled to downtown Los Angeles via metro. Haven't taken public transpo in years. Walking to and from the Metro to the conference I attended wearing business casual was quite a challenge. If you've been here in Los Angeles, CA, you know that the locals drive a car. Many Angelenos would rather get stuck in traffic for hours than take a public transportation.

If you're like most people who wake up, drive to work, and repeat the cycle --- you live in a plastic bubble. Even your car is an extension of that bubble.

Taking the train, sitting beside a complete stranger, staring at a sea of ethnicities is a paradigm shift. It brings out your empathy for humanity. Makes you envision what life would be like in their shoes. You should try it sometime.

I must have walked 4 miles. That's why I am very very tired. I hope you don't mind. I need to sleep now. ZZzzzzzzz!

"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing" ---Proverbs 18

Thanks to this week's winners:
Rey of Simi Valley, Tom of Pasadena, CA; Mike of New York; Debbie of Moreno Valley; Les of Montrose, Ernie of New York; Joseph of Quezon City

Wisdom from Rey of Simi Valley, CA

Airhead Vindication
sent by Tom of Pasadena, CA

This airhead decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these airhead jokes and how all airheads are perceived as stupid. So, she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart.

While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house. The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.

Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a heavy parka and a leather jacket at the same time.

He goes over and asks her if she if OK. She replies yes. He asks what she is doing and she replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all airhead women are dumb, and she wanted to do it by painting the house.

He then asks her why she has a parka over her leather jacket, she replies that she
was reading the directions on the paint can and it said ...

(You'll love this...)

"FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS."

Natural Laws They Don't Teach in Physics
sent by Tom of Pasadena, CA

	1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee. 2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe. 3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
	4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.
	5. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
	6. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
9. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.	7. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. 8. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!
10. Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.	11. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

12. Law of Public Speaking - "A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!"

13. Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!

14. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

If you don't forward this to your friends, your belly button will unscrew and your butt will fall off. Really... It's true. I read it on the Internet!

Videos of the week: (click on the picture)

Driving Aunt Chippy Crazy
Contributed by Ernie of New York

Jimmy Kimmel loves to play pranks on his Aunti Chippy. Watch this video and you'll find out why he gets such a kick out doing that.

Jealous Women
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA

If you were ever in doubt that wives have an in-built radar that tells them when their husbands have gone astray, you need to watch this. Here is jealousy in all its splendor.

Do Companies Charge More for Smartphone users?
Contributed by Michael of New York

Interesting research on how big companies market online. Something to remember when you're shopping.

Car vs Truck
Contributed by Joseph of Quezon City, Philippines

This isn't a joke but a serious reminder to drive carefully.

Billy Jean Beer Bottle
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena. CA

What do you do with empty beer bottles? Why you create a viral video using Michael Jackson's "Billy Jean" of course!

Japanese Multiplication by Lines
Contributed by Les of Montrose, CA

Did you know that 4 out of 3 people struggle with Math? Think about it ... It's a joke! (Sigh!) If you are a visual person, this may be an option for you. MORE MATH TECHNIQUES: Finger Math Latice Multiplication

Flight Attendant Humor
Contributed by Les of Montrose, CA

Wouldn't it be cool if you were a passenger in this flight?

War Story: The Pearl Harbor P-40 Boys
Contributed by Tom of Pasadena, CA

In celebrationof Veteran's Day, here's a war story of bravery of two young men who faced the Japanese war planes in Pearl Harbore.

Beer Commercial in Honor of Troops
Contributed by Debbie of Moreno Valley, CA

Guinness Beer's "Empty Chair" salutes the character of a community as they honor one of their own who is out of sight, but not out of mind. TGIF People! For you here in America, Happy Veteran's Day!